I wasn’t entirely sure I would post this. I’ve had this sitting in my brain for a few months now, and I couldn’t decide if I should write it, because somehow I feel kind of weird and awkward telling other people that I pray for my husband’s ex-wife. The thing is, though, I think we need more people to pray for their awkward situations and the people they don’t always get along with. The world would be a better place.
So I decided to sit down and thoughtfully write this out. I hope it encourages you to be the stepmom God wants you to be and that you will decide to pray for your husband’s ex-wife too. So here it is.
Why I pray for my husband’s ex-wife:
Regardless of what I think of her at different points in time, my husband’s ex-wife is a person too, and God loves her. If God loves her, and if Jesus tells us to “love your neighbor as yourself,” shouldn’t I pray for her as I would want others to pray for me? She is a person, and she is loved by God; therefore, she needs and is deserving of my prayers.
Chances are, she hurts too. Regardless of what your husband has told me about their divorce (how it happened, how she hurt him, etc.), I can guarantee you that there was some amount of pain on her end that my husband inflicted. Although, It may not be as deeply hurting as cheating, but my point is that, no matter what she did to my husband, he hurt her as well. She needs prayer to overcome her pain.
Most importantly, she is the mother of my step children. What affects her affects them. This includes her relationships, her finances, her spiritual well-being, her emotional and mental well-being, and her health. What affects my step children affects me, because their attitudes and behaviors will reflect how they are feeling. If I want my step children to feel loved and secure at our home, why wouldn’t I want that for them all the time?
If you truly care for your step children, pray for their mother. with Prayer, I will begin to forgive her for any hurt that she has caused us, and my feelings toward her may improve. Even if I don’t feel like I love her like your “BFF,” at least I can look on her more positively. And eventually, it is possible that her attitudes toward me will change, making life better for everyone involved.
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